don't know?

sad news and awesome news. which one first?
i shall start with the awesome news. because if i start with the sad one. then i wont have the mood anymore to talk bout the awesome one.

long dayyyyy for me!

lol. yesterday woke up at seven. reached school by 730

waited for chern yao. zi chuen. and wan hong. we had to go exxon mobil company to finish up our slides and rehearse our presentation for ten million times because before this exams was held and we didnt had time to practice our speech and blah blah blah.

took the bus from ikano. went to kj's lrt station. had a huge debate from the bus to the company ==''' hahaha. raeched at 11am. and started perfecting the slides! did that till lunch time. called mum and told her i'll be back before 5pm.

she said okay and continued finishing everything with su chin and edmond. ravin just came back from bangkok and was supposedly on leave but he came back to the office to help us. so awesome right. alwin joined us around one.

asshole.


practicing real hard till real late. see the sky outside? damn dark. wan hong in action.


working with everyone at menara exxon mobil.

had starbucks break. continued reheasing. called my mum to extend time. told her i'll be back before 10. practice the crap out of the crap. had macdonalds for dinner. told my mum will be home by eleven.

practiced more. told my mum will be home by twelve.

left the office at twelve. reached home at twelve plus. lol. thanks edmond and su. so so much.

woke up at 6. got to school. made sure everything went well. wan hong was doing the t-shirt. blady blar blar. so effing tired. have been in this kinda situation since saturday itself.

damn nervous thru out the whole thing. come on man. its scaryyy.

and

TADA!

WE WON BABY!

:D :D :D

we grabbed seven awards! all the awards! ahhhhhhh!

damn happy. seriously. hard work paid off!

yeahh i know. damn awesome right. the awards we won.

1. best annual report

2. best service/product award

3. best safety award

4. best presentation award ( 2nd placing)

5. best slide show award

6. best booth award

7. best employee award ( chern yao)

8. BEST OVER ALL COMPANY AWARD! : D : D : D

we are going to the national's baby! celebrate celebrate!

so effing tired! omggg. thank you so much ravin. su chin. and edmond. and yess su chin! he's one heck of a cute emcee okay. inside joke* whatever ravin ;D

nat. edmond. su. ravin. :)

Board of directors. and lovely secretaries.

chern presenting.

imba connection is like shit. picture size super huge. will upload when its faster. screw the connection.

the not awesome news?

yeahpss. i screwed my exams. i cant believed i actually cried over exams marks. yeahps. im just damn disappointed over my marks.

and all this while like during exams (monthly) and mid term. i put in like damn alot of effort. not alot on monthly cause yeahh. exams are damn fucking stressful for me.

okay before you give me the studies is not everything look. let me say what i wanna say.

i always say to myself exams are not everything. and there are more than life to these. i play hard. work hard. have a social life. and yess. awesome family. great friends. a real living God. however. i need to work my fucking ass off for this end term exams beacuse i wanna stay at the first class as SPM is like NEXT YEAR?!

so yess. im not saying that other classes are not smart, im just saying that i wanna be in the top class. and they look at your end year results to stream you.

and what the fuck. i worked my ass off like shit. to mantain in the top class. i stayed up like damn late. work as hard as i can. exhausted all the time because form four is not as easy as form three. and every fucking subject im taking in pure science now is like maths related. and my maths is like. shit. real effing shit. damnn stupid. so i ahve to struggle my ass off.

practicing. practicing. practicing. twice as hard. twice as smart?

and now? damn the damn results.

all this while i always said can do better. trying to comfort myself that everything will turn out for the best. yeahh i was living in hell. and the tears that came out today? its not only just for this exams. its for every damn disappointment i had to go thru. every single shit i struggled. if this is a test from God. im not sure if im hanging strong anymore. one can only take so much.

i need to excel in my studies. i want to give my parents an awesome life in the future. i wanna set a good example for my sisters.

personal glory is like 190498509856873497859 on my why i wanna be good in my studies list.

yeahps. i wanna get a scholarship. i mean like surely i know to get that you have to be extarodinarily outsatnding. everyone can get into college by parents money. but i dont want to. wont it be more satisfying that you get into college thru hard work? and i've got like sisters. i mean i know my parents will be able to afford the fees and all. but if i can i wanna reduce my burden for them.

so yeahh.

i hate disappointments. and i hate it when im the loser.

in everything i do. i wanna be the best. the awesomest. whats the point of doing something when you're not gonna be the winner at the end? i make sure i win for eveything i participate in.

so yeahh, im just rlly pissed. oh well. whatever la. lets not let this spoil my holiday mood shall we?

damn the exams. damn the effort. damn the disappoitment.

sorry for the language. i need to let it out.

oh yeahh. and please dont send symphaty text messages. i dont need them. it sounds so unsincere. i mean some. not all of all the texts. to the rest of. thank youu! :D

ohh and ahemmm. im just gonna write this down lol. beacuse. i dont know la. he wont be visiting my blog anyway. so he wouldnt know. i hope. hahaha. here su chin. i'll show you nice he is lol.

i was complaining bout my marks. and well. he signed in and stuff. and blah blah. so we talked.

<<>> - - says:
then say :D
natttttttt (: says:
57
natttttttt (: says:
yeahh
natttttttt (: says:
laugh your ass la
<<>> - - says:
i'm not laughing
natttttttt (: says:
or
natttttttt (: says:
at least you must be thinking
natttttttt (: says:
omgg
natttttttt (: says:
wth
natttttttt (: says:
damn stupid
<<>> - - says:
if u did try ur best then dun care abt wat others thinking.

omgg. that last sentence nearly stopped my heartbeat. crapp. ignore the grammar. focus on the meaning. I KNOWWWWW. damn nice righttt. HAHAHAHA.
natttttttt (: says:
seriously
natttttttt (: says:
i work like damn super super hard
natttttttt (: says:
how to study smart
natttttttt (: says:
seriosuly. i wanna give up de la
<<>> - - says:
change,we can believe in ;)

thats so political. influenced by alwin the ass. oh well.

hahaha. he's smart. and nice. for now. sigh.

till then. i need to finish everything on this list.

1. get some rest

2. clean my room

3. arrange my test papers and organize my files and books

4. spam accounts and bk.

5. buy form five books. or make sure im sure of all my form four facts.

6. watch meet the robinsons. i watched the movie like 790983497938408975 times already but the cartoon is so awesome and touching.

7. watch all the movieS in the shelf.

eat dinner now. TIREDDD! going out with steph tmrr! :D

nights!

and thanks nicole. you're rlly awesome! :)

thank you for being there all the time. and yess. i've no words to describe how awesome you are!

love ya secreatry lady! ;)